September 5: A few hours ago, anxious as heck, I sat in the parking lot at my local gym, waiting. On a whim I signed up for a membership last week with some friends and tonight was my first time visiting said gym. We were taking a 30 minute #HIIT class and while I was excited to try it, I was crippled with fear and anxiety. I’m the heaviest I’ve ever been. My belly gets in the way of everything. I’m not bendy in any way. Like at all! And, I have hip issues. I hate being watched. My anxiety made me get to the gym 40 minutes early. Scared I’d be late. Scared to show up after the class started. Everyone looking at me. So I sat in the car waiting. Fretting. Beating myself up for letting myself “go” all these years. If I had stayed in shape, I wouldn’t be scared I’d throw up in front of everyone. I fretted until the very last minute before the class started. But knowing I had a friend waiting and counting on me made me move my butt out of that car. Inside the gym, I swipe my pass and I can
I'm a day late for Friday Favourites. Which I feel like is basically my whole life these days...perpetually late for the important stuff (thank you anxiety), and early for the shit that doesn't matter. Well, let's get right into it. My week was BUSY AF but I did manage to squeeze in a few moments that brought me joy! Here's my take on Friday Faves...things that made me happy this week: It was Family Day here on Monday in Ontario (stat holiday). We spent the weekend filled with family gatherings, friend visits, dinners, movies, etc. So by Monday, we were all tapped out. The day was a much-needed pyjama and chill day for all of us. Those days are my favourite. Saturday night fun with the hubby I had to go to the office on Tuesday for my in-person work day. It was nice to see everyone but I was tired by the end. I don't think I'll ever get used to so much socializing again...how did I do it five days a week pre-pandemic?? I'll never know! In-office obligatory